Beauty Products That Really Work

An unashamedly girly post this week, on the beauty products I reckon are worth shelling out a few quid for. I've always had a thing for skincare, particularly as my skin has misbehaved in a variety of ways over the years, and have experimented with a wide variety of products at all price points, from much talked-about budget pharmacy brands to ruinously expensive potions from Space NK.

It's only taken about 20 years, but I think I've finally pinpointed the products that really work for me and actually justify their expensive price points. These are them...

Liz Earle Cleanse and Polish Cleanser and Gentle Face Exfoliator

I was a bit of Liz Earle refusnik for a while - I have no idea why, but I think it might be because I used to look at pictures of Liz Earle and find her a bit smug, therefore putting me off  the products. Silly me - both these items are brilliant. I took a while to get used to the whole hot cloth bit, and it's a bit of a faff if you're traveling and you can't dry your cloth, but this cleanser is a GOOD cleanser. I wish I'd known way back when that creamy cleansers are much more effective and kinder to your skin than gel cleansers, which generally sit on the skin, and can often strip oily skin, only making it produce even more oil (and therefore clog it up even more.) 

This is a gentle, non-aggravating cleanser with soothing ingredients like cocoa butter and eucalyptus oil. Once I've washed it off with the cloth, I then finish off with the exfoliator for a final polish. As exfoliators go, this is the kindest I've used and is gentle enough for daily use. It goes without saying I'm a convert to the Liz Earle way...

Dermalogica Gentle Cream Exfoliant

I use this once a week and it really seems to help smoothen and glowify skin. It's not an exfoliant you rub into your face but more of a mask that you leave on for 10 minutes before rinsing off. It contains both lactic and hydroxy acid both of which help to lift off dead skin cells, which can be buggers for clogging up your pores and causing spots. As the name suggests, it should be suitable for most skin types, even sensitive.

REN Wake Wonderful Overnight Facial

Everything about my face looks really tired and haggard when I first wake up. And that's only going to get worse, I guess. Where a splash of cold water once did the trick to wake everything up, nowadays I'm realising the necessity of employing something a little more intensive than a bit of H20 to make me look a less deathly in the mornings. I'm a big fan of REN products and this serum is a mix of fruit acids and omega oils...it's a combination that really does seem to give you a more radiant, less wrinkly pallor on waking up. If you worry about putting oils on your skin at night, really don't - they're a miracle cure for all kinds of facial ills and won't make your break out in boils, honest. Do note this product is not suitable for sensitive skins, though.

Erborian HD CC Cream

I've blogged about this wonder stuff before so I won't repeat myself but suffice to say, this tinted moisturiser is pretty spectacular at evening out skin tone, covering shadows and blemishes and generally making your skin look its best. Use it alone or with your foundation or even in lieu of sun cream - it's got an SPF of 45 so it's a good one to add to your suitcase if you're not keen on going barefaced to the beach.

Read my full review here. And don't hate me for recommending a prouduct that costs £38 - it lasts for ages and makes you feel happy in your skin. I think that's good enough justification...

A Weekend in Hay-on-Wye

There's a long list of places on my travel bucket list, mainly overseas and - unfortunately - not places I see myself getting to anytime soon. So I've decided to make 2016 the year I explore my UK bucket list - a cheaper and more convenient way to sate my wanderlust, plus there are a lot of places in our green and pleasant land I'd really like to acquaint myself with...Salcome, Whitstable, the trough of Bowland, to name just a few.

Hay-on-Wye was on my list too, until I had the pleasure of crossing it off on a recent trip over half term. If you have a passing interest in books, like exploring beautiful countryside and can think of worse ways to spend an evening than cosying up in a traditional pub, you'll probably love Hay as much as I did.

First, the bookshops. The place is heaving with them, but they're not like your local Waterstones. The bookshops in Hay are all independent, quirky places, filled with antiquarian delights for serious collectors as well as contemporary, first-hand books. These are places to browse for hours and pick up hidden gems, rare editions or specialist books covering every subject under the sun. If you've ever been to the delightful Daunt Books in London, that gives some flavour of what Hay's all about.

Don't miss a browse around Richard Booth's bookshop, one of the larger shops in the town, characterised by a gorgeous tile-clad facade. Inside the atmosphere is tranquil and genteel, with three floors of book-filled rooms, including a Folio Society reading area. Downstairs there's a lovely cafe - we popped in for coffee and cake but watched enviously as other diners enjoyed what looked like delicious brunch options.

Aside from bookshops, Hay's small but bustling centre is a great mix of cute cafes, gastro pubs and leftfield independents. I can't remember seeing one chain, aside from the odd building society or bank and one Spar. There is a good size Co-Op just off the main high street which is useful if you're self catering. 

If you're an urbane sort who likes to know where you're next macchiato is coming from, you'll love The Old Electric Shop, a cavernous shop and cafe filled with retro furniture, vintage clothing and the sort of curios that you'd probably pay a lot more for in Shoreditch. 

Another shop that caught my eye was was The End, a tiny, two-floor treasure trove filled with all sorts of interesting pieces for your home - I wasn't really after a massive cat head, but I was sorely temped to buy said item when I stumbled upon it, in amongst some lovely textiles, antique mirrors and edgy taxidermy.

The beauty of Hay doesn't lie solely in retail opportunities, though. It enjoys a wonderful location nestled on the Welsh borders, close to the river Wye, Offa's Dyke, the Brecon Beacons and the Black Mountains. We were lucky to have dry weather during our stay, but it was a bit too cold and grey for any major exploration. A wander along the Wye is a lovely way to stretch the legs, and on warmer days I'd imagine this makes a great spot for a picnic.

If you're into hill walking, don't miss a trip to the nearby Hay Bluff, a peaceful spot with impressive views across the surrounding hills. It was covered in snow when we visited so we were unable to climb to its summit, but it's a wonderful place to fill your lungs with air and enjoy some unbroken tranquility. 

Post-hike, you'll want warming up at a cosy pub - we found Hay's Blue Boar the best place for this, though there are plenty of other pubs to choose from in the vicinity. For food, we enjoyed fish and chips from Terris on the High Street as well as a delicious meal at the top-rated tapas restaurant Tomatitos. The atmosphere here is informal and friendly, and the food really authentic and good value. 

Our base for the weekend was a fantastic Airbnb find - 'Haybreaks' - which was perfect for our requirements - central location, budget-friendly and equipped with everything you might need on a short break. With two double bedrooms and two bathrooms, it's a perfect base for families and is situated on the main high street so everything is within easy distance. Our hosts were lovely, leaving us chocolate and prosecco to enjoy, and the apartment was absolutely spotless and filled with lovely furnishings, toiletries and essentials. I can't recommend this place highly enough.

Next up, Edinburgh and my very first trip to Scotland...

For more information on Hay-on-Wye, visit the tourist board website here.

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Getting to Grips with Getting Old

Life begins at 40, so the saying goes, but as the dust settles, the celebrating is over and 40 limps into 41, with 42 snapping a bit too closely at its heels, I haven't found it easy to accept the fact that I'm well and truly embedded into middle life. Just as it continues to astound me that I'm responsible for not just one but two  - TWO! - small human beings, I often wake up thinking I can't really be almost 43...can I?

Well, yes, it's a fact, usually brought pretty sharply into focus with that first glimpse in the mirror each morning. The grey hairs, the frown lines, the tired complexion...and the back. Have I mentioned the back? I never, ever thought I'd get a bad back. Well, now I'm middle aged, I have one. And a varicose vein...on my tongue! Who knew getting old could give you one of those?

As it goes, though, I can just about handle the physical changes at the moment (come back to me on that one in a couple of years...) but the mental impact of going beyond 40? Not so good. As someone with a tendency to anxiety, transiting from the home-building, family-growing adventures of my 30s to the 'is this it?' questioning of my forties hasn't been easy for me. I've become acutely aware of the lightening speed at which time now passes, and frequently wear myself out trying to pack as much into each day as possible (which really is exhausting now I'm nearly 43 - what happened to having boundless energy?) It's true what they say about time accelerating as you get older; feels like only yesterday I was hitching a papoose over my back, now my back hurts and I'm the bemused parent of a hormonal 12-year-old.

The great paradox of raising children is that while the days seem so very long when you're stuck at home with a baby or toddler, those years really do pass in a heartbeat. I know I was guilty of wishing time away when they were small, thinking perhaps that once they were sleeping through the night, eating solids, out of nappies, etc, life would become more manageable. In reality of course - and I can speak with some authority now I'm a middle aged person! - there will always be some new challenge to blindside you, so if you're new to this parenting lark, please don't wish time away; cherish those those long, routine-free days while you can.

Once they're at school, of course, the pace picks up. Time slips through your fingers. You'll no doubt be juggling commitments at work with other life stuff: caring for elderly parents or relatives, perhaps, getting involved in 'grown-up' things like the school committee, taking children to clubs, parties, friends houses, keeping on top of ceaseless housework and frequent irritations like homework and household IT issues. But despite being in a constant state of busyness, there will always be just enough time in my day for a mini panic, usually focused on work, money, the future..."Arrgh! I'm nearly 43! I can't be working in social media when I'm an over-the-hill old person! Arrrgh! I need to retrain! Arrggh! I'm too old to retrain!"...sound familiar? 

Becoming older is a sobering experience if you're a natural worrier and a seeker of stability. Having only just weathered the storm of the financial crisis, I've never been more acutely aware that my career never really got off the ground, my savings are small yet my outgoings ever greater. The worry of funding my children's further education - now only a few years off - looms large in my mind. I've never had a 'life plan' and now, at almost 43, that suddenly seems a bit remiss. Add in a constant drip of social media, where everyone else seems to be living the dream, and it's no wonder that so many 40-somethings succumb to that most insidious of malaises, affluenza. 

Then there are worries about health to contend with. Friends get diagnosed with cancer, parents get dementia and we imagine it's not so difficult for such things to happen to us, too. The invincibility of youth is replaced with a nagging hypochondria that makes us worry about every cough, lump and bump. 

I wonder how past generations approached middle age? The mid life crisis is not a new phenomenon but I can't help but feel that our obsession with clinging on to youth is something that's taken root in more recent years. Perhaps mine was the first generation most frequently told you can 'have it all', the first generation where travelling the world and leaving settling down till much later was the norm. An extended youth, free of responsibility is great, of course, but I do wonder if it makes the reality of middle age life just that bit more difficult to adjust to. 

Certainly my parents - who took one very frugal holiday a year (no half term skiing for them) rarely went out for dinner, and would scoff at the idea of 'life goals' - have often said that my generation, despite generally enjoying much more affluent, experience-rich lifestyles, seem pretty dissatisfied with their lot. While my parents made sensible provisions for their future, they didn't fixate on where they'd be in 10 years time, they just got on with life in the here and now, muddling along, enjoying the good times and doing their best to weather the storms when they passed overhead. 

So, now I'm officially middle aged I'm taking a leaf out of their book. To echo the words of psychotherapist Phillipa Perry in this excellent article by Miranda Sawyer, life really is too short to fixate on all the things you don't have, the goals you haven't attained now you're at that midway point:

"When people torment themselves with: 'If only I had… or if only I were…'," she writes, "I like to bring them to their actual felt experience of being alive in the present. People can suddenly find themselves alone, or jobless, at midlife and panic that they need another person or job in order to be alive. But that is only an idea. I like to keep things experience-based rather than idea-based. When they really experience the different relationships and occupations they actually have, they find that they are thriving."

Perhaps we could all do with a reminder that always imagining a more comfortable, more stable future is tantamount to letting the present pass us by. Because one day it is the future and though you may have those much yearned for things - the big garden, the stable job, the loft conversion - that most precious commodity, time, is far more tricky to pin down and contain. 

So how about a kinder approach to our middle aged selves: being a little more present in the moment, not beating ourselves up for not having achieved all those 'life goals'. Taking a step back from the frenetic pace of modern life and enjoying good health by looking after ourselves but remembering that our bodies - even our saggy, ageing ones - are awesome and hard-wired to keep us well. Spending time with people that matter and saying 'yes' more. Not bemoaning the passing of youth but taking joy in the knowledge that our happiest years (take a look at this article for evidence) may still be yet to come...

Christmas Presents That Last

If there's one thing about being a parent I've really struggled to get used to it's that kids come with a lot of stuff. They say it gets easier as they get older, but - as I step on yet another piece of Lego (I do love the stuff but I look forward to feeling carpet under my feet rather than dismembered mini figure heads sometime in the future) - I'm not so sure. My kids' stuff seems to take up more and more space, with football kits jostling for space with a variety of wind instruments, random bits from party bags accumulating on the kitchen counter and toy boxes over flowing with the aforementioned construction bricks. 

But you can't really tell the kids you're not buying them Christmas presents, can you? (even though it's very tempting when you quiz them on what they want and you can see that they really don't have a clue.) Rather than submitting to more costly, space-consuming toys with a limited shelf life, there are some things to give this Christmas that have appeal beyond the holidays, which don't create too much unnecessary clutter in your home - here are some of my suggestions*

Subscription to First News 

A weekly newspaper for children aged 7-14, First News offers high quality, age appropriate content and the added benefit of getting something new to look at each Friday. Although many schools get this paper, I'm not sure how many kids actually get to see a copy. This is a great gift for grandparents to buy - they'll like knowing they're giving a non-techy gift with purpose.

For the wildlife lover in your family, a subscription to National Geographic Kids is a great alternative.

Animation software

I'll be upfront and say I work for a major UK animation company but I'm really not getting commission to advertise their animation product! However, I couldn't not give it a mention as doing a little bit of animation with your child is really rather good fun. Not being the most patient of people, I had assumed the slow, meticulous nature of animating would test both mine and the kids boredom thresholds, but in actual fact there's something really appealing about working on a project that requires slowing down a gear.

It's also surprisingly easy to pick up the basics of animation, meaning your child will be animating themselves or their Lego characters in no time. 

Check out the Animate It! software here.

Classic Lego packs

Don't fret over that expensive Millennium Falcon ending up in bits by 31st December. My boys have always preferred to go 'freestyle' with their Lego creations so I'd recommend buying a big box of Classic Lego so they can enjoy a less prescriptive construction experience. You'll be amazed at what they come up with. Our boys have discovered some pretty out there tutorials on YouTube, resulting in the most imaginative projects, from recreations of football stadiums to M&M dispensers (yes, really)

You can also buy from the online 'Pick a Brick' shop if you'd like to supplement your box with some more unusual pieces.

Classic games

I'm talking Scrabble, Boggle, Battleships. Proper old school games that you can enjoy playing as an adult too (though never - NEVER - embark on a game of Monopoly with a child under 6...it will drive you bonkers.) We also recently discovered Uno - I'm not sure why it took us so long - and we played it pretty much constantly when we were on holiday in the summer as neither myself or the other half can ever remember the rules to standard card games. Uno is bloody brilliant. If you don't already have it, buy it as a stocking filler - it will be the best £6 (or thereabouts)you'll ever spend. 

A grown up sketch book and watercolour pencils

A good one for older kids - what's not to love about wrenching them away from their tablets to do something creative that doesn't involve lots of paint and mess. Derwent ink pencils are good and there are plenty of options for high quality sketching pads. 

For some lovely illustrative inspiration, take a look at the '20 Ways to Draw' books by Julia Kuo. There are some lovely guides for animal lovers, showing you how to draw everything from whimsical cats to funky frogs, while your young fashionistas will like trying their hand at sketching shoes, sneakers and dresses.

Walkie Talkies

Lots of LOLs to be had with these but you need to buy proper ones, not character branded kids ones that are utterly useless. Visit your local Maplin store for a good selection. We have the Binatone ones and they do the job - use them on days out, car journey convoys, round the house...a surprisingly enduring bit of kit that only involves the addition of batteries, a god send if you're technically-challenged like me. 

A simple puzzle

Those 3D ones are all well and good, but they don't stay together for long and will end up in pieces around your child's room eventually. They're also quite fiddly so you'll end up doing most of the work on them when your child's fingers tire of pushing tiny bits of puzzle into tiny slots. Having 'helped' create a Tower Bridge, Old Trafford stadium and various other global landmarks, I can vouch for the fact that they do try your patience somewhat.

So how about sticking with a nice traditional 'normal' jigsaw? A big one that you can do together on a cold winter afternoon, or perhaps a postcode puzzle that features your home, and which you can then stick to a piece of card and pop in a frame (we did this and it takes pride of place in eldest son's room)

Books

A no-brainer, really. One thing you can never have too many of. I've selected some of our favourites over the years here, but there's always something new on the horizon. 'Refuge' by Anne Booth and Sam Usher is a very pertinent take on the traditional nativity story, while I'll be buying my 7 year David Walliam's latest book, 'Grandpa's Great Escape'. 

Eldest son is hooked on the Alex Rider books by Anthony Horowitz, while you can't go wrong with the latest edition of the Guinness Book of Records for all your weird and wonderful trivia needs. I've also been reading good things about 'A Boy Called Christmas' by Matt Haigh, an interesting take on the Santa Claus story, and will be adding this to their stockings.

Theatre tickets

I'm a big believer in giving experiences, especially if other family members are really struggling to find a suitable gift. A cinema card or theatre tickets make a great present, especially for older children who understand the concept of delayed gratification a bit better. We received tickets for War Horse last year, which gave us a treat to look forward to in dreary January. This year I'm dropping hints about taking my 11 year old to Goodnight Mr Tom, coming to the Theatre Royal Bath in April.

*Please note that my suggestions have boys in mind, but are not exclusively for the male children in your house.

A Love Letter to Paris

Paris owns a small piece of my heart. I left a bit somewhere near the Left Bank, overlooking the water - that place where all those cliches about the City of Light really do exist: a couple simultaneously arguing and embracing as they stroll along the quayside, a gaggle of friends feasting on picnics of wine, bread and cheese, quite possibly discussing something very deep and philosophical. And now the sun is dipping behind those picture-perfect buildings, casting one last glow on the water to light the way for the bateau mouche gliding along the river...

That little piece aches today, though. It doesn't feel so happy in its spot by the Seine, so unusually quiet for a Sunday afternoon. There are no Sunday strollers today, no idling away the afternoon with a Gauloise and a cafe au lait. No mothers chide their children for skipping too close to the quay edge, no one lingers to browse the second hand book stalls.

It's not the Paris I fell in love with age 11, the Paris that loomed large in my imagination before I'd even stepped foot in France, a city pored over in French lessons, my Tricolore book suggesting life in Paris was a lot more exciting than life as I knew it. I wanted to eat tarte tatin, not a Mr Kipling's apple pie, drive round in a 2CV, not a Mini Metro, and go shopping in Tati, not M&S. 

Under the instruction of Madame Delavergne - my French teacher and the only teacher I can vividly remember from my secondary school days - I decided Paris was my spiritual home. Even a distinctly less-than-romantic school trip at the end of that first year failed to fade its glamour - yes, we stayed in a grimy hotel on an industrial estate on the outskirts of town, but we climbed the Eiffel Tower! We ate croissants for breakfast! We chatted to French boys on the cross Channel ferry!

The romance of the city became so embedded in my consciousness that I have often felt that in a parallel universe I'd be seeing out my days in a tiny, cat-filled apartment off the Boulevard St Germain. But of course, the years roll by and real life gets in the way of fantasy. We dream about drinking hot chocolates at Les Deux Magots or watching the world go by in the Jardins Tuileries when in reality we're stuck in front of a computer or trudging through the rain to pick the kids up from school. We get older and weighed down with responsibilities, and that trip to Paris we keep meaning to make never quite happens.

A few years back, though, we did leave our ordinary lives behind for a weekend, to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary. I was just as excited as I was when I arrived in Paris aged 11. The industrial estate hotel was replaced with a tiny room in the Marais, we left the queues at the Louvre to wander around the Rodin Museum and spent all our money on expensive coffees and delicious eclairs at Angelina's. It was a special trip that reminded me why my younger self found Paris such a fascinating, intoxicating place.

But with age comes the understanding that even our 'happy places' aren't immune to the problems and tragedies of real life. Real life is messy, sometimes dangerous, and a magical facade can hide deep fractures that the casual visitor can't see. Real life problems can shatter through simple joys in a moment - eating with friends, going to a concert, lying on a beach - making the happy places of not just our imagined world, but indeed our everyday lives, seem fraught with danger. That's why that little fragment of heart feels broken today. 

So, what do we do? Do we stop visiting our happy places or doing the things we love? Do we let the destructive acts of the minority stop us living out our fantasy lives or finding small joys in the everyday? Or should we continue as before, defending the key cornerstones of not just the French way of life, but principles that guide people all over the world, wherever they live and whatever their religion: Liberte, egalite, fraternite.

Paris has inspired many expressions of love and wonder over the centuries, including some that can seem a little trite in the aftermath of last weekend's events. While I still believe that "Paris is always a good idea", this quote by the Paris-born writer and philosopher Voltaire has particular resonance at this moment in time:

"God gave us the gift of life; it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well."

Paris, je t'aime. 

Devon in the Autumn

I hate being indoors. Being confined inside by bad weather or other annoying but necessary concerns - jobs, housework, waiting in for a delivery - can send me a bit cray-cray and I tend to panic about not being able to get out when the weather turns nasty. And so Autumn days signal a last-ditch attempt to get outdoors at every available opportunity, stockpiling reserves of vitamin D and wildly imploring my kids to breath in that fresh air and let the sun get to their pallid faces before the long winter kicks in.

And if there's anywhere to get a good dose of Autumn outdoor goodness, the Devon countryside and coast is it. On our recent trip to The Wood Life in Kenn, a small village just outside Exeter, we were blessed with benign days and mild evenings, allowing us to stay outdoors from early morning till late at night. In between hanging fire-side and stomping about in our own private wood, we boosted our serotonin in some lovely outdoor places.

With our nearest beaches straddling the optimistically-named English Riviera, we were keen to sample the coastal delights of this corner of the county. In all honesty, I prefer the beaches towards Dorset - such as Beer and Branscombe - or further South; Blackpool Sands near Dartmouth is a particularly lovely spot and isn't too far to travel if you find yourself based in the Exeter environs. 

That said, we enjoyed a lovely afternoon hanging out on the beach at Brixham, a bustling harbourside town where you can try your hand at crabbing, shop for souvenirs along the front or sit on the small beach, tucking into fish and chips - as a major UK fishing port, you can look forward to enjoying some of the freshest fish and sea food in the country here. We had some amazing cod, haddock and squid from Rockfish, a restaurant and takeaway overlooking the harbour.

Other beaches worth a peek include Babbacombe Bay and Oddicome Beach, which can be reached by a funicular railway for an added thrill kids will love. 

We didn't visit this time around, but Dartmouth is another highlight of this area. It's an upmarket resort full of lovely restaurants, quirky cafes and cute boutiques, as well as access to the aforementioned highly recommended Blackpool Sands, as well as other lovely coastal spots such as Slapton Sands and Bantham Beach.

Away from the sea, this corner of Devon is blessed with some idyllic countryside which really comes into its own on ethereal, mist-dappled autumn days. A walk through Dartmoor reveals tranquil, wooded corners and beautiful waterfalls. We enjoyed a meander through the peaceful Becky Falls where you can clamber over boulders and get close to the water. Other beauty spots in the area to check out include Lydford Gorge - the deepest gorge in the South West - and Parke, a peaceful gateway to Dartmoor where you can explore woodland and rivers.

For cream teas, independent bookshops and upmarket boutiques, Totnes is your place. It's a cute town with a cosmopolitan vibe - head to The Curator Cafe if you're missing your dose of hipster action. Plenty of other more traditional cream tea shops also abound.

For something totally different, don't miss Babbacombe model village - it's the antithesis of the modern family attraction and has a quaint, old-fashioned vibe that makes you feel as if you've been transplanted in the 1950s. It's a big outdoor space, where toy villages, shopping centres and famous landmarks nestle in amongst beautiful landscaping. They cut the grass surrounding the models with scissors - how cute is that! It's a big like Mini Land at Legoland and our kids were enthralled by it. 

For more suggestions of where to go in Devon, take a look at the tourist board website at www.visitdevon.co.uk.

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